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Life Journey Reflections » Poems: Lost Love

  • Poems

    Lost Love

    Two Lonely Boys

    I'm sitting here, lonely
    torn and sad,
    They expect me to be
    strong and not be bad.

    I'm full of talk and
    brave you see,
    But later there's tears;
    That's the real me.

    It's not fair, they hear
    me say;
    What did I do to
    deserve today.

    My little fella's crying
    away over there;
    I'm saying come over
    and sit on my chair.

    You can trust me, my boy,
    I'll care for you
    I'll love you my child
    When you're feeling blue.

    G. Dawson 27/3/86


    Never be mistaken by the smile on my face.
    Never be mislead by work-contentment at a pace.

    Beneath this all is a heart that breaks,
    And an inner man that pines for his mate.

    The tears they come as I sit here today,
    Spring rain gently falling on the hay
    God's strength is beautiful and helps a lot
    But I'll never deny my desires for my ...

    Thinking of you more
    today than most.

    G. Dawson 31/10/86


    The light has gone
    How do I learn to live?

    The cold of night
    How can I just forgive?

    How do I
    Live without you
    When you're burning in my soul?

    How do I
    Face the endless years
    Pretending that I'm whole?


    I'm now alone
    Yet folks are there
    I'm standing here
    But running scared

    I've never known
    This feeling before
    I've always felt loved
    I've always been sure

    I didn't even think
    How to perform
    I was just myself
    It felt the norm

    But now I stand
    Confused and small
    At the drop of a hat
    I feel I could bawl

    No longer strong self
    And warm security
    I'm out of whack
    Where is my maturity?

    Unquestioning, I did
    The things I'd always do
    Happily I'd let her do
    The things she had to do

    The world was there
    But never a threat
    Not even possession
    Like the care of a pet

    Then suddenly
    The trust was broken
    Oh how hard it is to see
    How all this fits in to my dimension
    What is love now, just a token?



    Angry? Hey, I didn't know
              Into marriage
              Full of dreams
              Days so full
              Smiles and beams

    Angry? It didn't show
              Alone with kids
              Feeding, bathing
              Bed and prayers
              Dad on the phone

    Angry? Yes
              Kids have grown
              Many moves
              Money, cows
              Jobs, it's crazy

    Angry? No just dead
              Talk is cheap
              But doesn't come
              He's thick as a brick
              Days are all the same

    Angry? I've grown accustomed
              I'll show him
              He'll care now
              What am I doing?
              I don't care

    Angry? I think that's gone
              It's bliss
              No cares
              Who cares
              Hey, I'm me, free

    Angry? Aren't I? Free?
              No I'm not
              Who is this girl?
              I don't know
              Will I let her go?

    Angry? Not me

    Graeme Dawson 19/07/86


    Desolation, barrenness,
    There's simply no way out.
    Sliding deeper- no one sees me,
    No one hears me shout.

    Silence, loneliness,
    My mind no longer whole,
    Set a trap and finally caught
    Myself- heart, mind and soul.

    March 2000

    My Husband

    As I look back through the haze
    Of mixed emotions through a glaze of tears,
    This journey we have started on
    Together, hand in hand
    Has been a pathway strewn with many fears.

    You know,

    He's plucked them one by one,
    Like petals taken from a thorny rose,
    And through all our bewilderment
    When justice seemed so far,
    He kept each fallen petal- held them close.

    He whispered softly,

    Calling gently through the storm
    "Hold on to what I've promised, cling to me."
    And when the raging tempest eased
    He left a tiny gift
    Of fallen petals-

    Scented Potpourri.



    Have I a voice?
    Is here a mind?
    Or am I reflection
    For your newest line

    Of funnies,
    Of clever
    Of great repartee

    To show you how good
    You are looking to me?

    Have I a spirit?
    A soul or a heart?
    Or am I a mirror
    So you looking smart?

    You show you
    How witty,
    How charming you be

    You show me the door
    And you smile as I leave.



Focal Point Yarra Valley 2009