I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my five-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mum! That lady isn't wearing a seatbelt!"
My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it in the garbage. Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my bathroom and came out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said with a charming little smile, "We better throw this one out too then, 'cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago."
On the first day of school, a first grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."
A woman was trying hard to get sauce to come out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her four-year-old daughter to answer the phone. "It's the minister, mummy," the child said to her mother. Then she added, "Mummy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."